12 January, 2011

12 January, 1944

438th AAA AW BN
APO 527 % Postmaster, N.Y.
England
Wed. January 12, 1944 1400
Dearest and only sweetheart –

I’m at the hospital now – sitting in the O.D. room at a small desk. I’m facing the window and as I look out it’s gray and raw-looking, dear; but I’m looking westward and projecting myself all the way back to Boston and Newton. It’s just off there – in the horizon, between those two old fir trees. What a wonderful mechanism, darling, is the so-called mind’s eye! I can actually picture myself getting out of my car, clicking my heels up your cement walk, reaching for the bell, trying to hear the gong and then waiting those few impatient seconds until I caught sight of you; then a short kiss with a quick glance behind to see if the outside door were shut and the neighbors not peek-a-booing. I can see that, sweetheart, right out in front of me right now – and I even find myself wondering whether you’re wearing a sweater and skirt, a black dress – or perhaps the deep purple one with the long V neck. It rarely made any difference to me, darling, because you always looked lovely to me.

But what would I be doing over at your house on a Wednesday afternoon? Well – let’s suppose it was our house on a Wednesday afternoon; I would have by now finished my morning’s work and no office hours Wednesdays! But heck – it’s cold and certainly no day for golf. Well – I don’t mind, dear. Oh – so you’re glad, are you? Really. I am too. It’s a swell day to spend together; where will we go? You know, dearest – that will probably go on from 1400-1630 and we won’t even leave the house. What will we be doing? I’m going to let you do a little supposing, too, darling. Anyway – it’s about time to dress – I mean for going out in the evening, of course – so we do and go out to have a few cocktails, dinner, theater, bridge – or anything else that might have been arranged. Gosh, dear, it’s getting late, what do you say we head for home? No argument?

Sweetheart – the rest of today here in England will be pleasant for me because I’m going to allow myself to stay in this mood – if you don’t mind. Do you think I’m entirely too imaginative, dear? Maybe I am, but it helps smooth over the mental rough spots manifested by lonesomeness and longing –

A night doesn’t go by, darling, but what I fall asleep with thoughts of you and me together. I swear, living with you when we’re married is going to be the most natural and normal thing in the world because in my imagination I have covered every conceivable situation and from every angle, and if anything was ever better set-up for two people, I’d like to hear about it. I’ve had you go so many places with me, do so many things with me, meet so many people – that it’s going to seem strange to me, I think, to have to re-introduce you to some of them. And what a thrill I’m going to get when I an actually introduce you as my wife!

‘My wife’ – something I’ve wanted to be able to say for a long time; And how happy I am that you are the one I’m going to be able to call that! Do you remember, dear, the first time we went to Salem? Well – it was on the way back, coming through the tunnel that I first felt something peculiar. I know I hardly knew you and all that, but running through my mind at that moment, fleetingly to be true, was the thought that you were the type of girl I’d like to marry. I will not say I loved you, then, because I still insist you just don’t ‘fall in love’ with someone on such short notice. But even at that time, darling, I was aware of your fine qualities. I liked the freedom of your visit, your ease and good nature. All these things impressed me quickly and darling it was so easy to fall in love with you! And staying in love with you is so wonderful that I often wonder if I’m worth the happiness. Sweetheart – if I could write the things I think while I’m away, you’d be amazed at the span of my emotion. If you’ll save some of my letters, we’ll pull them out a few at a time some cold night when we’re sitting around – and I’ll think back to each and tell you in person what I tried to convey at times in my letters –

Darling – I guess I didn’t write much about the news; there isn’t any and anyway I just felt like writing about you and me. I’ll write again, Sweetheart, and I truly hope you realize how much I love you and miss you and want you. For now, dear

All my love
Greg.

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