10 December, 1943

438^th AAA AW BN

APO 515 % Postmaster, N.Y.

Dec 10, 1943     1045

England

Dearest beloved -

I suppose that if you received my mail daily in sequence – it would read like a chronicle. It must be confusing to get them mixed, as you probably do. As I figure things, with censorship and the usual hold up of letters in the early days of arrival, you should be just about beginning to receive my mail somewhere about this date. Am I correct, dear? Of course this time of the year with Christmas packages and all I guess the mail is delayed even more than usual. I think you’ll eventually find, dear, that you’ll hear from me by air-mail in about one week’s time, which isn’t bad. I remember when I was in Fort Jackson, S.C. – it sometimes took 4 days for my mail to get home. Only there I was able to call frequently.

If you have my letter written last night, darling you’d know that we received no mail yesterday because the mail truck broke down. It finally got in about 0100, and was sorted out this a.m. – but no mail for me. So what can I do about it, dear? Nothing except to use my imagination again – and I sure do feel sorry for anyone who hasn’t got one and has to be away from home. I’ve been using mine pretty steadily, darling. When I don’t hear from you, I tell myself you are writing anyway and then I try to imagine what you might have written – and it’s always something sweet, dear.

Yesterday I heard a re-broadcast of an old “Hit Parade”. Number one at that time was “Brazil” and number two “It seems to me I heard that etc.” Frank Sinatra crooned, and the audience sighed deeply. Incidentally, I heard that someone was found at a Sinatra program who actually fainted. Investigation showed she hadn’t eaten all that day. In the evening I heard the program “Mail Call” direct from Hollywood – which is broadcast to soldiers overseas only. Lionel Barrymore, Dennis Day, Baby Snooks, and a few others took part. It’s wonderful, dear, to hear an American program – no matter what it is – And the American announcers sound so homey. And you know how irritating the advertisements used to sound? Well I’d like to hear a couple of choruses of Pepsi-cola and others. The B.B.C. and the stations of the continent have no advertisement at all. The program runs until the end of the half-hour or hour, the time is announced and the new program started. On the hour – the British Stations give the chimes of Big Ben from London – instead of the staccato notes of the WBC or CBS.

I’m getting as I can recognize more and more of the French and German that we hear so much of on the radio – so I’ll have to consider this trip as partly educational, dear.

I’m going to stop now – without closing the letter. I’ve got to do a couple of things before lunch – and perhaps today’s mail will be in, early p.m. Solong for now, Sweetheart

2200

Hello dear –

That was a longer pause than I anticipated. Several things turned up – but the one that took the longest was an unexpected trip to the hospital. One of our officers has been quite sick and I had to go see if he were going to be transferred out of our outfit. I didn’t get to the hospital until 1630 and after checking up on several of the boys – I met an M.D. who hails from the North Shore. Well we got to talking and he invited me to the Officers’ Mess. It was too late to get back to ours, so I stayed. Then we smoked awhile in the Officers’ Lounge and before I knew it – it was quite late, darling, and we had to make our way back thru the blackout. No, dear, I don’t often forget myself and let the hours slip by – so you needn’t start worrying about my being late for dinner and supper. If I know you’re at home waiting, I’ll be on time, dear, you’ll see. I don’t hurry now, because there’s no one here to hurry to. It will be swell seeing you often during the day (and night too, of course). That’s one of the privileges of being an MD, you can see your wife a whole lot more of your lifetime than the layman.

Coming back tonight – the moon was big and the sky clear – for a change. I looked up at it all the 31 miles back and dreamed of you. If you saw the moon too dear – you must have felt something because I was concentrating very hard.

On returning here I found no mail. I don’t mind so much but I’m beginning to worry about your receiving my mail. I do hope you are by now. I’ll close now Sweetheart because I’m tired and want to get some sleep. Be patient darling. I’ll write tomorrow and meanwhile –

All my love to you, dear

Greg

09 December, 1943

438^th AAA AW BN

APO 515 % Postmaster, N.Y.

Thursday, Dec 9, 1943   1630

England

Dearest Wilma -

The mailman has not returned as yet so I don’t know whether I’ll hear from you or not today. We get mail once a day here, incidentally, if at all.

Well today is 10 days from Graduation and I can well imagine how excited you are as you knock off day by day. It must be a little tougher on you than it was for us, because our Divisional Exams came at least a month before Commencement and we knew just where we stood. But I’m not very much worried as to how you’ll make out, dear, because I have a great deal of confidence in your ability. Good Lord, though, how I’d like to be there with you! I missed so much with you, leaving the States when I did. First your Birthday, then your Graduation, then Christmas and New Year’s. I get very lonesome when I think of the coming Holidays. I wonder what you’ll do on Christmas, and particularly New Year’s Eve. We could have had so much fun, darling. Here in England, by the way, New Year’s Eve is just another night. They don’t celebrate it at all, although the Scotch do make quite a time of it we’re told. I’ll probably stay up and write you a letter at midnight, say. And I’ll be thinking oh so hard about you and wondering what you decided to do. I know how much you enjoy life and I guess I don’t blame you, but it’s so difficult to think of those at home and not get blue when we think of days of celebration.

Excuse me, darling, for getting off on such a tangent. Well last night I went to my first English movie house. I’ve already written you that they show most of our pictures – a few months late. They also have their own. I saw one of theirs last nite – called “The Flemish Farm” – and among some of the players was Clive Brook – remember him? It was another one of those pictures about Germans and occupied Belgium, but there were several good scenes and suspense was created with as equal imagination as Hollywood has. The best seats are in the first balcony, the worst are in the orchestra, just the reverse of ours. But all over England you are permitted to smoke anywhere in the theater and there are ash-trays behind each seat. That reminds me, darling, that Salem’s own Paramount theater (for which I once had an all year round courtesy pass for 2 because one of the owners was a patient of mine) allows smoking upstairs.

I’m going to leave now for a short while, dear, chow’s on!

1930
Hello Darling!

Chow wasn’t that long. We had a Battery Commander’s meeting at 1830 and we just got thru. Coming over to the dispensary from headquarters I looked up to see the moon. Full moon is the 11th and you know how I feel about full moons, dear. As a matter of fact the moon here isn’t very pretty; you can hardly see it thru the mist. I don’t need a moon to feel the way I do, anyway.

I just got some word on the mail situation for tonight. The mail truck broke down on its way back. They’ve called for someone to tow it back and since it’s quite a distance from here – I can forget about mail for tonight. I don’t know how long it’s going to take to become stoic about disappointments and waiting. I know that I’m not used to it yet. I hope I won’t get used to it, Sweetheart, even though that sounds paradoxical. What I mean is that I want to miss you and want you and feel disappointment at not hearing from you right up to the day I hold you in my arms again for always – and I know that’s the way it will be.

I often wondered about love and being affected by it. I even voiced my opinion (to your Mother). I know I made it sound very abstract and matter of fact. I wasn’t entirely wrong – but I was never aware of a certain something that can’t be put into words, that I never experienced, darling, until I met you. The combination of what you want in a woman, plus this certain something, doesn’t come often or ever, I suppose, to some people. I have it, darling, in my knowledge and love for you and it makes me happier than I’ve ever been before – despite the agony of being separated. I keep telling you I’m happy – and you must wonder how I can be. That’s why I’ve tried to explain how and why I feel that way. Do you understand, dear?

I seem to be particularly wordy tonight, dear – but it’s easy, especially when you can keep writing and no one interrupts your conversation – not that you ever did.

Wilma, darling, I wonder if you gather from my letters how much I love you and want you to be waiting for me when I return. I want it like I’ve never wanted anything before. Also I might warn you, dear, that anything I’ve ever really wanted, I’ve got – so you might as well resign yourself to me dear, because I want you very very much.

I’d better stop now, dearest, until tomorrow. I hope you’re hearing from me reasonably regularly now. I hope to hear from you tomorrow, but if not – you’ll be just as near to me as you always are in my mind and heart. Goodnight, dear and you have

All my love

Greg

08 December, 1943

438^th AAA AW BN

APO 515 % Postmaster, N.Y.

Wednesday, Dec 8, 1943 1100

England

Dearest Girl -

You can see by the time that I probably won’t be able to finish this at one sitting, but I thought I’d start anyway, since I happen to have a few spare moments just now. At 1130 I have to attend a B.C.’s meeting where we all air our views about different matters. Today I’m going to beef about the mess-kit water not being hot enough. I do that periodically, and they are getting used to it by now. As long as the boys don’t get any disease from contamination, I don’t care.

I’m sitting at my desk, near a warm stove, dear, with the radio playing Gypsy music, softly. It’s very comfortable – but you would complete the picture beautifully. Speaking of pictures reminds me of a statement you made in one of your letters – i.e. – that with time your picture might become dimmed. I don’t know, dear, whether you meant that figuratively or literally – but in either case you were way off the beam. Even without your photograph, darling, your image is very much in my mind; a picture will help – but even if either should be dimmed in my visual sensory mechanism, it wouldn’t matter at all because Sweetheart – it’s what you are basically that I love. Suppose I can’t visualize you? What of it? I know that when I left home I left behind me a girl whose qualities and make-up I loved and who in addition, loved me. That fact won’t get dimmed ever in my memory sense, believe me, darling – and it will bring me back to you, I know.

The program has changed to dance music and right now they’re playing “Put Your Arms etc.” and boy how I’d like to! The native dance bands – as I hear them on the radio – aren’t too good. The leading band leader seems to be a fellow named Victor Sylvester, and he isn’t bad. Yet he can’t touch Dorsey, Miller, Goodman, James et al. They play a lot of our old numbers like ‘Blue Skies’, ‘Who’. I’ve listened to hear ‘Dark Eyes’ – but so far, dear, no luck.

I did hear Bob Hope’s program the other night – or did I mention that? It was a Monday at 7:30 p.m. or 1930 and it was therefore about 1430 in the States. It was a special overseas program, done weekly. Crosby and Langford were on with him, and they wise-cracked freely. The ad-libbing was plentiful and they addressed all their remarks to the soldiers. I haven’t been able to find out about Jack Benny’s program as yet – but I understand he does one, too.

I have to leave right now, dear. Excuse me.

1240

Hello darling –

Just got back from lunch. We had steak, mashed potatoes, diced beets, mustard, pickles, coffee, pineapple and home-made tarts, and that wasn’t an extraordinary meal – either. Right now I’m waiting for one of the other officers to call for me. The BC’s are custodians of the funds of the batteries. We lugged our cash overseas and now we’re going to deposit it in an English bank – possibly Barclay’s. They have branches all over England and if we should move right from this spot – we’d have a branch somewhere else.

And news? Well what opinions you can get from the papers here and some natives – they all seem to feel that the war in Europe can’t last much longer. They feel the ‘Jerries won’t stick it’. The British are not a bunch of wishful thinkers – so maybe they have the right dope. Gosh, darling, how long must I dream of the ride back and the moment when I see you and I don’t know what? Will I be reserved? Wait and see, darling.

I’m afraid I’ll have to close now Sweetheart, – they’re waiting for me. Starting with this letter I’m addressing you at home on the hunch that it will take about that long to get to you. At any rate your mother will hold it.

Solong, my darling – I miss you terribly dear – particularly with the approach of the coming holidays, but what can a fellow do but sit tight and wait, and that’s what I’m going to do. I’ll write you again tomorrow, dear and until then – you have for safekeeping

All my love

Greg

07 December, 1943

438^th AAA AW BN

APO 515 % Postmaster, N.Y.

Dec. 7, 1943     1645

England

My dearest Sweetheart -

I used to think about overseas in a rather abstract way, I think. I would wonder how it would feel to actually be away. Now I know. Yet despite the awfulness of distance and the impossibility of being in close contact with beloved ones, I think it must be tougher on those at home.

I just received two more letters from you, darling – the most recent being the letter written on the 21st, after your long week-end at home. They were very sweet letters and told me very very much. But you were a very lonesome girl that week-end, dear, – very lonesome. We must have been thinking along the same lines, about the same time – as I think back.

First about my getting to meet an English girl, dear. Before I get to know one, I’ve got to meet one, don’t I? Darling, I haven’t got the slightest desire to meet an English, American, French, Russian, Italian, Burmese – or any other kind of girl. How could I want to, when I know you and love you so much? I know that you can’t help thinking things – to wit, I do the same. But you must have implicit confidence in my steadiness and my mind. I have one obsession, darling, and that is you – no matter where I go. Always, always remember that fact. I found you and knew immediately what I had been looking for. I loved you and tried to make you do the same; I’m not going to let anything destroy that!

Before you wrote what you did – or at least before I received this last letter, darling, I touched on a subject which you ask me to discuss. You remember before I left I kept saying I wished you and I had been engaged. I still wish it, dear – but remember, many an engaged person is so by virtue of a ring only, and not by much more. I feel I’m engaged, attached or any other word to you. You know my folks as no other girls I knew knows them; I know your folks rather well too. As far as I’m concerned, darling, I want to come home to marry you and that’s all I’m interested in.

I told you the other day, darling, how I felt about your going out. That’s going to be entirely up to you, dear. It’s probably easier for me not to go out than for you. After all – not many people in England are interested in me – For you it’s different, and I know that it must be difficult after sitting around night after night – not to accept what seems like a harmless invitation. Furthermore – it will be worse once school is over. All I can say, dear, is that I hope you don’t tell me about it. That’s fair enough, isn’t it?

Now I hope I’ve make myself clear on that subject. I was pleased to hear that my father had written you. He’s really out to hook you for me, I guess – and I’ll have to thank him.

You must be plugging away at the books these days and nights. I hope you’re concentrating and I want you to hit those exams hard.

I think your relatives are swell for remembering me so. I’m glad they do, dear, and don’t forget to send them all my best regards.

And out here in England, darling, there’s nothing at all in the line of news. My sight-seeing has consisted mostly of seeing the countryside on my visits to the hospital. The infernal fog and mist are a nuisance and are just what A. Conan Doyle said they were. It is actually difficult to walk even in the daytime. And it does get depressing not to see the sun day after day – just a moist grayishness that soaks everything. The ground and sidewalks never get dry – or at least never since we’ve been here. And because of our latitude and longitude (whatever they are), the sun never gets up very high in the sky. It reaches a point about as high as the sun would go in our country at about 1000 – and then starts sinking. Consequently, darling, it doesn’t start to get light these days until about 0845 and it’s dark right after 1700.

But it doesn’t really worry me very much dear. The fact is that this is all temporary and I’ll be coming back to you one of these days and we’ll stay in New England. Salem has some nice weather – and when it gets bad – we’ll stay in.

Now Sweetheart I hope you’re feeling well and taking care of yourself. I’m interested in how you’re making out in your quest for something to do after school is over – and I’m very much interested in whether or not you’re finding time very heavy, and whether the desire for diversion is very great in you. Write me, darling, and tell me – will you?

That’s all for now, dear – I hope I’ve answered your questions – You’ve got me, darling, and you’ll have me always – if you want me; no matter where I go, I’m coming back to you.

All my love, darling

Greg

06 December, 1943 (to her parents)

V-MAIL

438^th AAA AW BN

APO 515 % Postmaster, N.Y.

Dec 6, 1943

Somewhere in England

Dear Mrs. B. –

I have at home about 800 pennies which Wilma and I will gladly stake against any and all combinations of Bridge players – even and including you and Mr. B. Seriously though, I’ve been playing the game frequently since I left, and I’m enjoying it thoroughly. You were right.

Your letter was very pleasant to receive, and I hope you continue to write. I certainly missed not being with Wilma on her Birthday and I’ll feel particularly lonesome on her Graduation Day. I hope you all have a very happy day. I’d give a lot to be able to be with you.

But I waited a long time until I met a girl like Wilma, and I can wait some more – to do my celebrating. I warn you, I shall insist on re-celebrating every holiday, birthday, Graduation – or similar function that I missed while I was away. Will you and Mr. B. be my guests?

Thanks again for writing and my best regards to Mr. B. So long for now –

Sincerely,

Greg

[Note from FOURTHCHILD: Greg used Wilma's full last name throughout this letter, not the more familiar "Mr. B." or "Mrs. B." It has been shortened for anonymity.]

06 December, 1943

438^th AAA AW BN

APO 515 % Postmaster, N.Y.

Dec 6, 1943

Somewhere in England

Dearest Sweetheart –

I’ve just got back from a first aid lecture. I gave one this morning, too – and I bet I really know something about the subject when I get back to practice. This being Monday, dear, I find it no different from any other day, including Sunday. Yesterday was nice though because of the mail I received from you – but I believe I’ve told you, darling.

On re-reading your letters today, dear, I find them just as enjoyable, and I’m taking up from where I left off. You mentioned your pictures, Sweetheart. I hope you’ve sent them or it out by now. I’ve got the swellest spot on my desk and I’m anxious to fill it. I’ve answered your question about your mail getting to me. We are assured that regardless of the time, or any other factor (except loss at sea) the mail eventually gets to us. As I wrote yesterday, dear, I got a big avalanche. I hope they continue to come. I suppose my own will reach you in the same fashion. But I certainly do love your constancy in writing, darling, you can’t imagine how much. And if you’ve been a poor correspondent in the past, you’ve certainly done a swell job as far as I’m concerned.

Mentioning ‘swell’ reminds me of a funny word the English use – i.e. ‘yell’. In talking of Bob Hope, for example, they say “He’s a yell” – which I suppose isn’t too far from our “He’s a scream”. And they never say “What’s the latest dope?” but “What’s the latest gen?” , which is short for ‘general knowledge’. But they think we’re just as funny, so it all evens up. Incidentally, their comedians are very corny (a word which is hard to define to the British. Try it, dear, and you’ll see).

You mention in one of your letters about meeting someone on the train, and you end your paragraph with a desire of being married to me. I’ve experienced the same feeling and have tried to analyze it. You know I mentioned it wasn’t fair, etc., etc. I still suppose it isn’t, darling, and yet what a wonderful feeling to know that someone belongs to you. That’s why I feel so swell when you write me such comforting things.

I wish, darling, that you’d forget all about my birthday present. You are all the present I want and I’m happy about that. Besides, as you write, it might get lost – and that would be wasteful. It’s sweet of you to think about it and mention it – and I appreciate it. Anyway, I can’t think of a thing you could possible send me. I’ll tell you what, right after the war, you get me a nice knit tie (not tan) to wear with some new suit I get, and we’ll call it even.

I was sorry to hear about Stan. It’s unusual for him not to look well. He used to be able to chase around a lot, work – etc and still look in the pink. I believe he never really got over his sickness, because he doesn’t seem to be able to fight things off. As regards Shirley, that must be worrying him somewhat too. She’s apparently playing it very cozy. He keeps running between Newton, work and Winthrop – and the combination must be a difficult one to continue. I wonder if they’d let me commute between England and Newton. Stan wrote me a card and asked me to drop a note to Shirley. He gave me her address, but for the life of me I can’t think of her last name, I don’t know why. Would you let me know, dear?

Your Mother’s letter arrived with yours yesterday and it was thoughtful of her to write so soon. It’s swell of your folks to think of me as they do, and the implications your mother left were very nice to read. I shall write her soon; and I trust your father is well long before now.

So here I am darling, closing another letter and feeling near to you, as I always do while I’m writing you. It’s a wonderful sensation and if I keep rambling, it’s because I’m reluctant to end the illusion. I dream so much of us being married and enjoying life in Salem and visiting our folks and naming our children. Gosh, Sweetheart – we’ll have such a wonderful life together – see if we don’t. For now, so long, dear and

You have All my love

Greg.

Well – I've more time, so I’ll write some more. It’s not hard. I haven’t done very much here as yet and seem perfectly content to just hang around. I will continue to do so until the war’s over, dear – so never worry about losing me in any way.

It’s such a queer thing, meeting a girl that you might not have met – and loving her. I think of that often and wonder about it. I couldn’t possibly have ever found anyone like you, darling – or have ever gotten that feeling of being so in love with anyone else. I know it, and it only makes me marvel at the way someone steers things. Long ago it must have been decided that we were meant for each other and if the Lord looks after such things, I certainly am happy for my share.

Again – so long, dear – and I miss you terribly but love you even more so. You are now the recipient of the most intensive mental kiss and hug ever put down on paper, (Wipe your lipstick, dear). Goodnite, darling and my

Sincerest love

Greg

05 December, 1943

438^th AAA AW BN

APO 515 % Postmaster, N.Y.

Dec 5, 1943 Sunday   1530

Somewhere in England

Dearest, darling Wilma -

A measure of one’s happiness is truly a relative thing. Today – Sunday the 5th I received the first letters from you, your mother, my folks and my brother. It seems to me, Sweetheart, that I’ve been happy before in my life time, for instance when I graduated College and Med School, or when I opened my office – and I suppose many other occasions which slip my mind now. Darling I say truthfully that I was never more happy, never had a more elated, satisfied feeling – then I had an hour ago when I was handed a nice stack of envelopes with some swell return addresses on them. Gosh, dear – I know I’ve mentioned each day that I’ve written you about not hearing from you, but it took all the restraint I could muster not to tell you how really blue and lonesome I’ve been not hearing from you. I’ve wanted news from you so very very much. That’s all I’ve had to look forward to. And the things you’ve written me are just what I’ve wanted to hear. Darling – never feel that you are telling me too often; I look for it in all your letters and it makes me feel wonderful.

When I got all your letters – I didn’t know what to do. At first I wanted to read them all immediately. Then I thought I’d ration them, one or two a day as long as they lasted. But, darling, I made a pig of myself and read each and every one of them. But I’ll keep re-reading them, over and over again.

There are so many things you mentioned – I don’t know where to start. To go a way back – to the night letter I’m so glad you received. Although the sequence of the letter and the regular mail must have been a bit confusing – you did very well in surmising what you did and hit it right on the nose. The night letter however did not come from Boston, dear.

You were very sweet, darling, to write my folks and call them. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it or how glad I am that you want to. I can tell you how they feel though, because I got a swell letter from my father today, too. He writes that you were not only thoughtful, but lovable to do it and that my mother is “crazy about you”. They not only love you, darling (you are so easy to love) – but they are so happy that I’ve met and love a girl as fine as you. Knowing I’m happy too – makes them even more happy. They’ve wanted so much to see me get settled – not alone as I was in Salem, but with a wife, and I guess they know pretty well that we’ll be married when I get back. They have that thought to help them while I’m gone – and Sweetheart I have you to thank for making them feel a little better.

It’s funny your mentioning bridge. I’ve already referred to it. I haven’t played much this week – but I’ll keep playing it until I really know the game. The more I play it – the better I like it. That’s true of many things – like loving you, darling.

I laughed at what you had to say about Medwin. But I give him credit for discerning that I was very much in love with you – although as I think of it dear, that shouldn’t be too hard to gather. You did feign trouble a couple of times in interpreting whether I was serious or not, remember, dear? But on the whole – I think I give myself away pretty easily.

I’m glad about Shirley’s brother. He deserves all the credit due him. I remember seeing the N.Y. papers’ review of the program. One in particular was very favorable. It certainly was a break for him.

And about my brother at the dance – I hope he had a good time and continues to go. But the “auto girl” part interests me. No, no, dear – not personally. You are all I’m interested in – and that brings up another thing – that old friend of yours, Bill R. What you wrote was just what I wished you’d write – and yet I feel so guilty at your refusing to see him, or any other fellow for that matter. I’m a jealous fellow, dear, I believe I’ve told you before. And knowing you were out with someone else – would make me very unhappy, and yet you are young and have so many opportunities, I hate to think of your having to refuse them. I don’t know how to couch my words. I want you to live and enjoy yourself and go out and meet people, and yet Sweetheart – I want you to be mine and no one else’s. That’s selfish, and I know it – and the only unselfish thing I can do about it is not have you mention the matter at all. Remember, darling – you have my love, I have yours. You are willing to wait and I want you to. Nothing else matters to me – but I don’t want to lose you to anyone else!

I’m awfully pleased that J and J remember me and refer to me as they do – even jokingly. We’ll show them, darling – and a lot of other people besides.

I’m going to stop now – but I’ll continue tomorrow. Darling, I’m very happy and very much in love with you. Being married to you is going to be wonderful. You know what I wonder about sometimes? Well I try to imagine what our first difference of opinion will be about; you know everybody has them. So far I haven’t got any idea what it could be. And – one more thing – I think it’s swell of the girls, all of them, to be so thoughtful about me and please tell them – we’ll have them all over to our house for a big party after the war – so I can thank them personally.

My deepest love, Sweetheart

Greg.

* TIDBIT *

about Shirley's Brother


Leonard Bernstein

"Shirley's brother", referred to in this letter, was Leonard Bernstein. On the 16th of November in 1943, Leonard Bernstein, who had only recently been appointed to his first permanent conducting post as Assistant Conductor of the New York Philharmonic, substituted on a few hours notice for Bruno Walter at a Carnegie Hall concert. The concert was broadcast nationally on radio, receiving critical acclaim. Soon orchestras worldwide sought him out as a guest conductor.